A week of Paleo Recipes for the Exhausted Mom
I know where you are. You’re exhausted. Stressed to the max. Eating a handful of nuts and calling it lunch. You feel like you’re losing your mind. You want to do all this stuff for your PANDAS / ASD / Autoimmune / Allergic / Asthmatic / Eczema kid, but you’re too tired to even think about it, much less put in the time and research to get started actually doing it.
(Why grain free? No, we don’t have celiac disease. In fact, I thought gluten free was for quacks. Jokes on me….Check this out…fighting autoimmune disease with a grain free diet protocol.)
I come from a long line of wheat farmers. We’re talking immigrants from Russia, to Germany, to the midwest. Land that’s been farmed for generations, passed down with love and hard work. Along with that is a rich tradition of bakers. Incredible, Mennonite heritage, faithful bakers. Beautiful pies, Bohne Beroggies, Bierocks…. memories of Grandma pounding the dough, biscuits, cinnamon rolls…I was the granddaughter who wrote the cookbook full of family treasured family recipes. All that to tell you, if you think it’s hard to give up your twinkie habit, I’ve got news for you, try telling your family of wheat farmers that you don’t eat grain. Not just wheat, but no corn, no rice, no white potatoes, no legumes. This was a huge sacrifice for us, and quite honestly, when I hear parents say "it's too hard" or "we can't do that" or "my 5 / 10 / 12 year old keeps finding sugar", it's enough to make me want to burst into tears. If your child can't drive, doesn't have a job, doesn't have an income, then YOU parent are responsible...YOU are the one who decides what foods come into your home. YOU have the power to change the pantry. Is it a sacrifice? Yes. Is it expensive? Yes. Will you have to choose between the mall and organic produce? Probably. Is it worth it to do all of this just to help one child be healthy? Absolutely.
When we started this thing, I went through my pantry and gave it away. A huge laundry basket, plus a big box, full of yeast, rice, flour, refined sugars, brown sugar, beans. Not to mention the grain mill, because I was grinding my own flour….I was that mom. We weren’t “bad” eaters. We didn’t eat a bunch of processed junk all the time. But when we did this, I knew we couldn’t make my "sick" daughter eat differently than the rest of us, we had to do it as a family, or it would never work. Little did I know how much better I would feel. Or that my husband would lose so much weight. And I would lose that 4 year old “baby” weight. And the kids would do so much better.
So….
Step 1. Get out the trash can, or take it to your food pantry. Get it ALL OUT of the house and don't bring it back in. When you’ve got no other options, you have to make it stick. White sugar, Brown Sugar, Corn Syrup, Pancake Syrup that's really corn syrup with caramel coloring, gone. We only sweeten with coconut sugar, pure maple syrup (the kind that comes from a tree), and honey. Real, raw honey. Then start reading labels...if you don't know what it is, can't pronounce it, or it wasn't ever alive, you shouldn't be eating it. (Alive would be...plants, and animals that ate plants. Anything else, not alive. Red D&C, not alive.)
Step 2. Sign up for Plan to Eat. It’s a lifesaver. Trust me on this. Don’t trust me, you don’t even know me! But, it’s a 30 day free trial, so it’s win win either way.
Step 3. Go to these blogs and start “pinning” your favorite recipes onto your Plan to Eat account.
(There are tons more out there now...when I orignally wrote this post, it was slim pickings, now you can search Autoimmune Paleo Protocol and find a jillion recipes.)
Step 4. Go grocery shopping. Plan to Eat will make your list for you…it’s awesome. Did I mention that? You’re going to need some sweet potatoes. Meat. Lots of meat. Coconut Flour. Almond Flour. Maple Syrup (grade B, not the fake stuff). Honey (real, raw honey. Check the labels.) Vegetables. The green kind. Organic everything (if possible). And fruit. Blueberries. Raspberries. Apples. And nuts. Get started soaking and dehydrating your nuts asap. Much more digestible. (Get a dehydrater, it’s worth it.)
Step 5. Don’t panic. YOU CAN DO THIS. Life changing, family future changing stuff. It’s worth it. Do it for your babies. Do it before they can drive to McDonalds. Do it for yourself.
Have your emergency plan for travel. The only thing we’ve found that halfway “works” is Chic Fil A, kids meals, grilled chicken nuggets, fruit cup, and apple juice. When you’re on the road and didn’t bring a cooler full of food with you, this is a good compromise (gasp!) Their grilled market salad is good. Just don’t bother with any dressing, it’s all full of soy. Oh yeah, and the ketchup and sauces are full of corn syrup and other things you can’t pronounce. Skip that. Try not to think about it. It’s better than starving all the way across the state to Grandma’s house.
First on the agenda, order your donkey milk. We have a wait list for our fresh milk, so the freeze dried donkey milk from Italy is a great place to start. (You can still be on the wait list for raw milk, farm pick up only.)
THEN start the grain free / Paleo diet protocol, you can read what it is and why it works here or just trust me on this and jump right in. (We went Paleo, but didn’t follow the strictest autoimmune paleo protocol, honestly, just switching to grain free paleo was a huge transition, and we saw tons of benefit from it.)
The easiest way to start is to get your Plan to Eat subscription, (you can do a 30 day free trial), then add these recipes to your planner. It will make the grocery list for you. Then send your hubby to the store, he gets the app and checks off the list on his phone. You can even stalker watch him check them off, just to make sure he gets everything right. (Not that I would do that…)
Oh, and about those Paleo recipes. See how the people are all super skinny on these blogs? Double the recipes, or triple them. If you’re lucky, you’ll have leftovers you can freeze or eat for snacks. You’ll thank me later.
Laziness disclaimer: I like leftovers. Some of this might not be on strict autoimmune paleo protocol. We still do butter and goat cheese occassionally, and I think that’s technically not “allowed” on the autoimmune. Check into it, replace with coconut milk or almond milk if preferred. Oh, and did I mention I’m just a mom? Not a dietician. This is just to get you started when you don’t know where to start.
Monday
Breakfast: Pancakes with blueberries, drink your camel or donkey milk with a bit of real grade b maple syrup! (Double or triple this recipe so you’ll have leftovers for tomorrow. I’m not a morning person.)
Lunch: Bacon wrapped sweet potato bites I skip the spices so the kids will eat them and cook these on a lower temp for longer, so I don’t set off the smoke alarms. Make extra. INCREDIBLY yummy!
Snack: Sliced apples with almond butter or Peppermint Crunch Marshmellow Cookies (I just plop mine with a spoon, not all the fancy shapes and colors. Cut out the parchment paper with them on there, put them in baggies in freezer and they keep forever, and don’t stick to the parchment so bad.)
Dinner: Easy Roast Chicken (make 2. Put in oven 2 hours ahead of dinner.) Throw some spinach under it and call it good. Or, if you’re fancy, make this Pear and Goat Cheese Salad. And invite us for dinner.
Bedtime: Drink your donkey milk with a bit of syrup, then brush your teeth.
Tuesday
Breakfast: Crepes or Leftover pancakes, reheat in the oven (NOT THE MICROWAVE! Throw it away!) fruit, drink your donkey milk with a bit of syrup!
Lunch: Leftover chicken with sauteed spinach (or just eat it cold. Straight from the fridge. With your fingers. I won’t judge.) Or, Meatza.
Snack: Hard boiled egg and / or apple or Refridgerator Fudge (I add cocoa to mine, and cinnamon, to taste) or Dark Chocolate Peanut Butter Granola Bars (use almond butter instead of pB, and soak and dehydrate nuts if possible, best for gut health)
Dinner: Blackened Salmon with Mango Avocado Salsa or leftover Meatza from lunch.
Bedtime: Drink your donkey milk with a bit of (REAL) maple syrup, then brush your teeth.
Wednesday
Breakfast: Bacon and eggs (cooked however you like them, if you fry or scramble them, use coconut oil), or you can make these fancy eggs Shirred Eggs. drink your donkey milk with a bit of syrup!
Lunch: Leftover Meatza or Stuffed Sweet Potatoes
Snack: Snickerdoodles be warned, this took longer to bake than the recipe said, but I made mine crispy or Applesauce
Dinner: Crock Pot Roast
Bedtime: Drink your donkey milk with a bit of syrup, then brush your teeth.
Thursday
Breakfast: Zucchini Chocolate Chip Muffins (make extra) or Pumpkin Pie Muffins and / or Eggs how you like them, drink your donkey milk with a bit of syrup!
Lunch: Leftover beef pot roast
Snack: Fruit or Granola
Dinner: Spinach and Egg Casserole (some people say it’s just for breakfast, I like it for dinner too.)
Bedtime: Drink your donkey milk with a bit of syrup, then brush your teeth.
Friday
Breakfast: Leftover muffins and / or some good sausage, drink your donkey milk with a bit of syrup! OR Pumpkin Spice Dutch Baby
Lunch: Bone Marrow Custard (don’t gag, this is awesome, and so good for you! If you’re off of dairy for autoimmune, use the cream off the top of canned, full fat coconut milk)
Snack: Apples and hard boiled egg or Crispy Fried Bananas
Dinner: Grain Free spaghetti and meatballs
Bedtime: Drink your donkey milk with a bit of syrup, then brush your teeth.
Drink Options:
Some mom’s have asked me what to drink, other than water. Honestly, my kids drink water with their breakfast now! We also love coconut water for a treat, or Kombucha, or donkey milk. And I recently took up coffee again. Totally acidic and not paleo, but soap making at 5:30 is no joke, ya'all.
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